what can i do?
what do i need to do?
how can things get better?

Great Recent Speech by the Israeli PM....

Subject: Great Recent Speech by the Israeli PM....

"Ladies and gentlemen, leaders of the world. I, the Prime Minister

of Israel,am speaking to you from Jerusalem in the face of

the terrible pictures from Kfar Kana.Any human heart,

wherever it is, must be sickened and recoil at the sight of

such pictures.

"There are no words of comfort that can mitigate the enormity

of this tragedy.Still,I am looking you straight in the eye and

telling you that the State of Israel will continue its military
campaign in Lebanon.

"The Israel Defense Forces will continue to attack targets

from which missiles and Katyusha rockets are fired at
hospitals,old age homes and kindergartens in Israel.

I have instructed the security forces and the IDF to

continue to hunt for the Katyusha stockpiles and launch

sites from which these savages are bombarding the

State of Israel.

"We will not hesitate, we will not apologize and we will

not back off. If they continue to launch missiles into

Israel from Kfar Kana, we will continue to bomb Kfar Kana.

"Today, tomorrow and the day after tomorrow. Here,there
and everywhere.The children of Kfar Kana could now be

Sleeping peacefully in their homes, unmolested, had the

agents of the devil not taken over their land and turned

the lives of our children into hell.

"Ladies and gentlemen, it's time you understood: the Jewish

state will no longer be trampled upon. We will no longer allow
anyone to exploit population centers in order to bomb our

citizens. No one will be able to hide anymore behind women

and children in order to kill our women and children.

his anarchy is over.You can condemn us, you can boycott us,

you can stop visiting us and, if necessary, we will stop

visiting you.

"A voice for six million citizens.Today I am serving as the

voice of six million bombarded Israeli citizens who serve

as the voice of six million murdered Jews who were

melted down to dust and ashes by savages in Europe.

In both cases, those responsible for these evil acts

were, and are, barbarians devoid of all humanity, who set
themselves one simple goal: to wipe the Jewish people

off the face of the earth, as Adolph Hitler said, or to

wipe the State of Israel off the map, as Mahmoud

Ahmedinjad proclaims.

"And you - just as you did not take those words
seriously then, you are ignoring them again now.

And that, ladies and gentlemen,leaders of the
world, will not happen again.

"Never again will we wait for bombs that came to hit the

gas chambers. Never again will we wait for salvation that

never arrives. Now we have our own air force.

The Jewish people are now capable of standing up

to those who seek their destruction – those people will

no longer be able to hide behind women and children.

They will no longer be able to evade their responsibility.

"Every place from which a Katyusha is fired into the
State of Israel will be a legitimate target for us to

attack.This must be stated clearly and publicly,

once and for all. You are welcome to judge us, to

ostracize us, to boycott us and to vilify us.

But to kill us? Absolutely not.

"Four months ago, I was elected by hundreds of thousands

of citizens to the office of Prime Minister of the government

of Israel, on the basis of my plan for unilaterally withdrawing

from 90 percent of the areas of Judea and Samaria, the

birth place and cradle of the Jewish people; to end most of

the occupation and to enable the Palestinian people to turn
over a new leaf and to calm things down until conditions

are ripe for attaining a permanent settlement between us.

"The Prime Minister who preceded me, Ariel Sharon, made
a full withdrawal from the Gaza Strip back to the

international border, and gave the Palestinians there a

chance to build a new reality for themselves.

"The Prime Minister who preceded him, Ehud Barak, ended
the lengthy Israeli presence in Lebanon and pulled the

IDF back to the international border, leaving the land

of the cedars to flourish, develop and establish its

democracy and its economy.

"What did the State of Israel get in exchange for all
of this? Did we win even one minute of quiet? Was our

hand, outstretched in peace, met with a handshake of

encouragement?

"Ehud Barak's peace initiative at Camp David let loose

on us a wave of suicide bombers who smashed and

blew to pieces over 1,000 citizens, men, women and

children. I don't remember you being so enraged then.

"Maybe that happened because we did not allow TV
close-ups of the dismembered body parts of the

Israeli youngsters at the Dolphinarium? Or of the

shattered lives of the people butchered while

celebrating the Passover seder at the Park Hotel

in Netanya? What can you do - that's the way we are.

We don't wave body parts at the camera.

We grieve quietly.

"We do not dance on the roofs at the sight of the
bodies of our enemy's children - we express genuine

sorrow and regret.That is the monstrous behavior

of our enemies. Now they have risen up against us.

"Tomorrow they will rise up against you. You are

already familiar with the murderous taste of this

terror. And you will taste more.

"And Ariel Sharon's withdrawal from Gaza.

What did it get us? A barrage of Kassem missiles

fired at peaceful settlements and the kidnapping of
soldiers.Then too, I don't recall you reacting with
such alarm.

"And for six years, the withdrawal from Lebanon has
drawn the vituperation and crimes of a dangerous,

extremist Iranian agent, who took over an entire

country in the name of religious fanaticism and is

trying to take Israel hostage on his way to

Jerusalem - and from there to Paris and London.

"An enormous terrorist infrastructure has been
established by Iran on our border, threatening

our citizens, growing stronger before our very
eyes, awaiting the moment when the land of the
Ayatollahs becomes a nuclear power in order to

bring us to our knees.

"And make no mistake - we won't go down alone.

You, the leaders of the free and enlightened world,

will go down along with us. So today, here and now,

I am putting an end to this parade of hypocrisy.

"I don't recall such a wave of reaction in the face
of the 100 citizens killed every single day in Iraq.

Sunnis kill Shiites who kill Sunnis, and all of them

kill Americans -and the world remains silent.

"And I am hard pressed to recall a similar reaction
when the Russians destroyed entire villages and

burnt down large cities in order to repress the

revolt in Chechnya. And when NATO bombed Kosovo

for almost three months and crushed the civilian

population - then you also kept silent.

"What is it about us, the Jews, the minority, the

persecuted,that arouses this cosmic sense of

justice in you? What do we have that all the

others don't?

"In a loud clear voice, looking you straight in the
eye, I stand before you openly and I will not

apologize. I will not capitulate. I will not whine.

This is a battle for our freedom. For our humanity.

For the right to lead normal lives within our

recognized, legitimate borders. It is also your battle.

"I pray and I believe that now you will understand
that. Because if you don't, you may regret it later,

when it's too late.

ISRAEL AND JERUSALEM FACTS

1. ISRAEL BECAME A STATE IN 1312 B.C., TWO MILLENNIA
BEFORE ISLAM.

2. ARAB REFUGEES FROM ISRAEL BEGAN CALLING

THEMSELVES "PALESTINIANS" IN 1967, TWO DECADES

AFTER (MODERN) ISRAELI STATEHOOD.

3. AFTER CONQUERING THE LAND IN 1272 B.C., JEWS
RULED IT FOR A THOUSAND YEARS AND MAINTAINED A

CONTINUOUS PRESENCE THERE FOR MORE THAN 3,200 YEARS.

4. THE ONLY ARAB RULE FOLLOWING CONQUEST IN 633 B.C.
LASTED JUST 22 YEARS.

5. FOR OVER 3,200 YEARS, JERUSALEM WAS THE JEWISH
CAPITAL. IT WAS NEVER THE CAPITAL OF ANY ARAB OR

MUSLIM ENTITY. EVEN UNDER JORDANIAN RULE,
(EAST) JERUSALEM WAS NOT MADE THE CAPITAL, AND NO
ARAB LEADER CAME TO VISIT IT.

6. JERUSALEM IS MENTIONED OVER 700 TIMES IN THE
BIBLE, BUT NOT ONCE IS IT MENTIONED IN THE QUR'AN.

7.KING DAVID FOUNDED JERUSALEM; MOHAMMED NEVER

SET FOOT IN IT.

8. JEWS PRAY FACING JERUSALEM; MUSLIMS FACE MECCA.
IF THEY ARE BETWEEN THE TWO CITIES, MUSLIMS PRAY FACING MECCA, WITH THEIR BACKS TO JERUSALEM.

9. IN 1948, ARAB LEADERS URGED THEIR PEOPLE TO
LEAVE, PROMISING TO CLEANSE THE LAND OF JEWISH

PRESENCE. 68% OF THEM FLED WITHOUT EVER
SETTING EYES ON AN ISRAELI SOLDIER.

10. ON THE OTHER HAND, VIRTUALLY THE ENTIRE

JEWISH POPULATION OF MUSLIM COUNTRIES HAD

TO FLEE AS THE RESULT OF VIOLENCE AND POGROMS.

11. SOME 630,000 ARABS LEFT ISRAEL IN 1948, WHILE
CLOSE TO A MILLION JEWS WERE FORCED TO LEAVE

THE MUSLIM COUNTRIES.

12. IN SPITE OF THE VAST TERRITORIES AT THEIR
DISPOSAL, ARAB REFUGEES WERE DELIBERATELY

PREVENTED FROM ASSIMILATING INTO THEIR HOST

COUNTRIES. OF 100 MILLION REFUGEES FOLLOWING

WORLD WAR 2, THEY ARE THE ONLY GROUP TO HAVE

NEVER INTEGRATED WITH THEIR CO-RELIGIONISTS.
MOST OF THE JEWISH REFUGEES FROM EUROPE AND

ARAB LANDS WERE SETTLED IN ISRAEL, A COUNTRY
NO LARGER THAN NEW JERSEY STATE.

13. THERE ARE 22 MUSLIM COUNTRIES, NOT COUNTING
PALESTINE WHILST THERE IS ONLY ONE JEWISH STATE.

ARABS STARTED ALL FIVE WARS AGAINST ISRAEL, AND

LOST EVERY ONE OF THEM.

14. FATAH AND HAMAS CONSTITUTIONS STILL CALL

FOR THE DESTRUCTION OF ISRAEL. ISRAEL CEDED MOST

OF THE WEST BANK AND ALL OF GAZA TO THE PALESTINIAN AUTHORITY, EVEN PROVIDED IT WITH ARMS.

15. DURING THE JORDANIAN OCCUPATION, JEWISH

HOLY SITES WERE VANDALIZED AND WERE OFF LIMITS

TO JEWS. UNDER ISRAELI RULE, ALL MUSLIM AND

CHRISTIAN HOLY SITES ARE ACCESSIBLE TO ALL FAITHS.

16. OUT OF 175 UNITED NATIONS SECURITY COUNCIL
RESOLUTIONS UP TO 1990, 97 WERE AGAINST ISRAEL;

OUT OF 690 GENERAL ASSEMBLY RESOLUTIONS, 429
WERE AGAINST ISRAEL.

18. THE U.N. WAS SILENT WHEN THE JORDANIANS DESTROYED

58 SYNAGOGUES IN THE OLD CITY OF JERUSALEM. IT REMAINED

SILENT WHILE JORDAN SYSTEMATICALLY DESECRATED THE ANCIENT JEWISH CEMETERY ON THE MOUNT OF OLIVES, AND IT REMAINED SILENT WHEN JORDAN ENFORCED APARTHEID LAWS PREVENTING

JEWS FROM ACCESSING THE TEMPLE MOUNT AND WESTERN WALL.

THESE ARE TRYING TIMES. WE MUST ASK OURSELVES

WHAT WE SHOULD BE DOING, AND WHAT WE WILL

TELL OUR GRANDCHILDREN ABOUT OUR ACTIONS

DURING THIS CRISIS, WHEN WE HAVE THE CHANCE

TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE.

START NOW! SEND THIS MESSAGE TO 20 FRIENDS, AND ASK
EACH OF THEM TO SEND IT TO 20 MORE. JEWISH OR NOT,

IT DOES NOT MATTER.

TRUTH AND PEACE ARE VALUES COMMON TO ALL OF US.

EVERYONE MUST KNOW!

Shepherd by Paul Zaia

I will give my heart to You
Forever faithful God
Guide me to Your truth

I will go where You may lead
Your hands of grace will guide
They draw me to You side
I praise Your name forever
Join with the shouts of Heaven
Glorify

You are the King of Glory
You are the Lord Almighty
You are the Shepher of my heart
I will give You all my praise
I'll follow You always
The Shepherd of my heart.




if only i could be like the Almighty Him, serving some with the heart of a shepherd.

I AM SO DISAPPOINTED.

today i wonder. how come i am not able to convince people. yes, now i finally believe that people often inform other people of certain things and i am kept in the dark and i am not aware of. why? can't you people just come straight to me and spell everything straight to my face and seek calrifications? why do you have to go through so many chains of commands? this isn't the SAF.

just ask me, why is that thing there? and i will say. the stuff might be there but i may not be doing it? it just happened to be there, safekeeping for a friend. so ya, i just know where certain relationships stand. what i cannot understand is why people cannot ask me questions straight direct to me but have to beat about the bush. tell me and i will explain, and whether you guys believe it or not it's all your decisions because i know i have done my best.

now that i think back when i received that phone call, no wonder i felt so funny. i really had no idea what was it about.

I AM SO DISAPPOINTED.

2 Timothy 1:3-12 (New International Version)

New International Version (NIV)

Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society

Encouragement to Be Faithful

3I thank God, whom I serve, as my forefathers did, with a clear conscience, as night and day I constantly remember you in my prayers. 4Recalling your tears, I long to see you, so that I may be filled with joy. 5I have been reminded of your sincere faith, which first lived in your grandmother Lois and in your mother Eunice and, I am persuaded, now lives in you also. 6For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands. 7For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.

8So do not be ashamed to testify about our Lord, or ashamed of me his prisoner. But join with me in suffering for the gospel, by the power of God, 9who has saved us and called us to a holy life—not because of anything we have done but because of his own purpose and grace. This grace was given us in Christ Jesus before the beginning of time, 10but it has now been revealed through the appearing of our Savior, Christ Jesus, who has destroyed death and has brought life and immortality to light through the gospel. 11And of this gospel I was appointed a herald and an apostle and a teacher. 12That is why I am suffering as I am. Yet I am not ashamed, because I know whom I have believed, and am convinced that he is able to guard what I have entrusted to him for that day.

the winds of the the dunes

if i were to be covered by the sand dunes now,
how great would it be.

no strength to blog properly

ya ya...
stupid FR lim ml.

tmr's call time @ 8am...song boh...



regrets regrets

i have regrets of doing certain things,
i can't help it but i still continue to think.
decisions were made,
but regrets were late.

still i will continue to sing You praise,
even till the moment i pause to thank.
i offer to help,
and i continue to tell.

Reputations tarnished,
Images brought down.
Friends are lost,
People are eventually gone.

Relationships got screwed,
Emotions were fooled.
To You i apologise,
For You i will tesitify.

Depressions come and depressions go,
They have come again and when they will go i do not know.
To You i pray that it will go away,
Even till the day when my soul will rise away.

Take care my friend(s),
You have to stand strong and allow no matters to destruct your plans.

Be strong and courageous...

TIME FOR EVERYTHING - FRANCIS

Ecclesiastes 3 (New International Version)

New International Version (NIV)

Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society

Ecclesiastes 3

A Time for Everything

1 There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under heaven:

2 a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,

3 a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,

4 a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,

5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,

6 a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,

7 a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,

8 a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.

9 What does the worker gain from his toil? 10 I have seen the burden God has laid on men. 11 He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end. 12 I know that there is nothing better for men than to be happy and do good while they live. 13 That everyone may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all his toil—this is the gift of God. 14 I know that everything God does will endure forever; nothing can be added to it and nothing taken from it. God does it so that men will revere him.

15 Whatever is has already been,
and what will be has been before;
and God will call the past to account. ^[a]

16 And I saw something else under the sun:
In the place of judgment—wickedness was there,
in the place of justice—wickedness was there.

17 I thought in my heart,
"God will bring to judgment
both the righteous and the wicked,
for there will be a time for every activity,
a time for every deed."

18 I also thought, "As for men, God tests them so that they may see that they are like the animals. 19 Man's fate is like that of the animals; the same fate awaits them both: As one dies, so dies the other. All have the same breath ^[b] ; man has no advantage over the animal. Everything is meaningless. 20 All go to the same place; all come from dust, and to dust all return. 21 Who knows if the spirit of man rises upward and if the spirit of the animal ^[c] goes down into the earth?"

22 So I saw that there is nothing better for a man than to enjoy his work, because that is his lot. For who can bring him to see what will happen after him?

SO, for me basically i need to do what i have to do... what i did was already done. i tried telling myself not to feel so despressed over it but it's very hard to get rid of it - i am still losing sleep over it. cannot get to sleep, ya, that's the reason why. i miss You and i miss you. all the best for all your upcoming thing which you will be involved in for approximately 2 months? all the best!

i broke my promise which i made myself, really so stupid. i feel so stupid after 11.15pm. i pray development do not start again, cause i am afraid of this thing call pain. i'm glad so many are falling in love.... one of my friend's brother's falling in love too... my blessings go out to him!!! God bless U my friend...!

Footprints in the Sand

Footprints in the Sand

One night a man had a dream. He dreamed
he was walking along the beach with the LORD.

Across the sky flashed scenes from his life.
For each scene he noticed two sets of
footprints in the sand: one belonging
to him, and the other to the LORD.

When the last scene of his life flashed before him,
he looked back at the footprints in the sand.

He noticed that many times along the path of
his life there was only one set of footprints.

He also noticed that it happened at the very
lowest and saddest times in his life.

This really bothered him and he
questioned the LORD about it:

"LORD, you said that once I decided to follow
you, you'd walk with me all the way.
But I have noticed that during the most
troublesome times in my life,
there is only one set of footprints.
I don't understand why when
I needed you most you would leave me."

The LORD replied:

"My son, my precious child,
I love you and I would never leave you.
During your times of trial and suffering,
when you see only one set of footprints,
it was then that I carried you."

kaypoh

1 Peter 4:12-19 (New International Version)

New International Version (NIV)

Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society

Suffering for Being a Christian

12Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. 13But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed. 14If you are insulted because of the name of Christ, you are blessed, for the Spirit of glory and of God rests on you. 15If you suffer, it should not be as a murderer or thief or any other kind of criminal, or even as a meddler. 16However, if you suffer as a Christian, do not be ashamed, but praise God that you bear that name. 17For it is time for judgment to begin with the family of God; and if it begins with us, what will the outcome be for those who do not obey the gospel of God? 18And,
"If it is hard for the righteous to be saved,
what will become of the ungodly and the sinner?"^[a]

19So then, those who suffer according to God's will should commit themselves to their faithful Creator and continue to do good.

finally knew the true meaning of what it takes to be sort of a "kaypoh" dating from a few months back. really have been so kaypoh to help but shit happens. I am glad that this passage woke me up, but then, i guess i still fear being a kaypoh...

it's been a week. can't get over it. it's worse than pain...but so? what can i do?
losing sleep, losing concentration, losing my emotional self...


Thanks Henghan & Dr V. so much for that help. no words can express my thanks.

I have no choice but to enter this in...i was given the Rhema word...

Joshua 1:5-9 (New International Version)

New International Version (NIV)

Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society

5 No one will be able to stand up against you all the days of your life. As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you.

6 "Be strong and courageous, because you will lead these people to inherit the land I swore to their forefathers to give them. 7 Be strong and very courageous. Be careful to obey all the law my servant Moses gave you; do not turn from it to the right or to the left, that you may be successful wherever you go. 8 Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful. 9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go."

Christ, being Your son is such an amazing thing to be. To be baptized in Your Holy Spirit is even a great breakthrough. I now only realized how great it is to be Your baptized son. When You - God Almighty spoke to Joshua after Moses died and I read it, it came straight to me as if a new revelation.

So, yesterday, i was unable to meet the all time favourites FKK and HTHT. Yes, to all who wants to know, it's the DVD crap over and over again. And from the voicemails i've received from FKK, he repeatedly made claims that he wants to sue me for the slow processing of the DVDs because SSA wants to sue NP and NP wants to sue him so he claimed he would want to sue me. ok fine, take it that i had never taken Media Law module before. I think it's very likely to press charges against me without the signing of contracts. And the story goes on and on and on.

And this FKK goes to his confidant - HTHT. Apparently, both of them pull the other one in. And i think the reasons given were not valid. Suddenly the role of that someone changes. What a good move by FKKHTHT...

So both that someone and i are going to meet the all time favourites today at FMS office. Sure i will try my best.

New Paper is just a call's away. Whatever it is, i will try my best. I might have done something wrong in the process. But FKK's words used on me and some others were even more powerful. Glad i did not delete the voicemails. Shall clarify with Lai Sim as to whether the word "sue" first came from her. And ya, the idea of expulsion also rose... what great idea... I am just too tired of hearing all these.

For I know this is an obstacle for me to cross, I know...

i'm still up

afraid cannot wake up. what the heck...got test ar...

but i was rather happy i should say. but like i wrote in the previous entry, happy for what...

my head is killing me... stupid fever...

Solution to my life's difficult questions

saw this book when i browsed through Zondervan's website. read the description of the book and realized that perhaps i may need to really read this book with my heart. the times of shit which i am going through is really so damn difficult.



God's Answers to Life's Difficult Questions

Written by: Rick Warren
List Price: $16.99 (USD) $21.99 (CAD) £9.99 (GBP)
Series: Living with Purpose
Format: Hardcover, Jacketed
Page Count: 208
Book & Bible Cover Size: Thinline
Weight: 1 lb
(453 gm)
ISBN: 0310273021
ISBN-13: 9780310273028
Available: October, 2006
Publisher: Zondervan
Synopsis:
Rick Warren takes you to the Bible for answers to twelve of life’s toughest questions. Drawing from the examples of different biblical characters who faced the same issues, Warren offers concise, practical insights you can understand and apply in order to move past hardships and experience a life of purpose and significance.
Description:
How can I …

cope with stress?

rebound from failure?

defeat depression?

have peace of mind?



Life’s difficult questions have answers.



Answers from the Bible that can change your outlook—and your life.



Rick Warren writes, “In each of these studies, you will discover simple ways to apply God’s truth to your personal life, your family, and your job. The way to get the most out of this book is to act on it.”



Rick Warren takes you inside the Scriptures to see what they reveal about twelve of the most pressing questions people ask. They are questions you yourself either have asked or most likely will ask. This book provides simple, straightforward answers you can begin to apply right away to move past your worst sticking points and enjoy a life of purpose, peace, and significance.





for those who wants to catch a glimpse of this book, click here for the pdf.

Boyzone - Words

Words

Smile
An everlasting smile
A smile can bring you near to me
Don't ever let me find you wrong
Cause that would bring a tear to me

This world has lost it's glory
Lets start a brand new story
Now my love

You think that I don't even mean
A single word I say

It's only words
And words are all I have
To take your heart away

Talk
In everlasting words
And dedicate them all, to me
And I will give you all my life
I'm here if you should call to me

You think that I don't even mean
a single word I say

It's only words
And words are all I have
To take your heart away

It's only words
And words are all I have
To take your heart away

Da da da da da da da
Da da da da da da da da da da
Da da da da da da da
Da da da da da da da da da da

This world has lost it's glory
Let's start a brand new story
Now, my love

You think that I don't even mean
a single word I say

It's only words
And words are all I have
To take your heart away

It's only words
And words are all I have
To take your heart away

It's only words
And words are all I have
To take your heart away

so... suddenly i reminded myself of words which i've heard... they will still be the words which have already been spoken... sighs....

A Diminishing Francis

woke up today and realized one thing - freaking fever!

damn it... supposed to meet the "all time favourite" henry tan and fkk. but what the heck, my health's more important. so i don't care so much.

exam's coming soon. checked on NPAL for my exam timetable...what the - 9 am schedule... die lar die lar...

there's adv audio post test tmr...sure fail..why? study only that 1%. test at 10am. song liao song liao... cannot wake up sure die - just like drama prod final test.

hope that my creative jucies will come back to me for doc pro. have to make the edit something good.

sms can always be a emotional catalyst (the good thing) and it can also be a emotional spoiler (the bad thing). guess today the smses i received were of the catalyst type. What logic is that? FLL - the Francis Lame Logic. but no matter that i still have to remind myself constantly that what's over is over. what's done's been done. so why the heck so happy? for what? but anyways, thanks yeah.

and so, no matter what... it's still this way...

Artist: Boyzone Album: Where We Belong Title: No Matter What Chorus: No matter what they tell us No matter what they do No matter what they teach us What we believe is true No matter what they call us However they attack No matter where they take us We'll find our own way back I can't deny what I believe I can't be what I'm not I know I'll love forever I know, no matter what If only tears were laughter If only night was day If only prayers were answered Then we would hear God say Repeat Chorus And I will keep you safe and strong And shelter from the storm No matter where it's barren A dream is being born No matter who they follow No matter where they lead No matter how they judge us I'll be everyone you need No matter if the sun don't shine Or if the skies are blue No matter what the end is My life began with you I can't deny what I believe I can't be what I'm not I know, I know I know this love's forever That's all that matters now No Matter What

i miss this place - memories

anyone wants to chill out with me at the board game shop? there's one at holland V!!! forget it...maybe no one is interested....well, i'm a loser who does BORING STUFF...LAME GAMES!

FRANCIS LIM - YOU'RE A LOSER!!! HAHAHA

so for those who are interested in the lame loser stuff which i just mentioned, go to http://sg.settlerscafe.com/

Enjoy!!!

first thing to SIM - kena sian....

A SIAN DAY AGAIN.

could not go to indoor stadium for prayer revival meeting. why? got things to do.

what only...

went to school in the afternoon. shit, no point going there. made me sad upon reaching my first principal location.

went ameen, found out that i still remember a lot of old songs. old love songs are cool n emotional ya... please allow me to forget them.

i miss the darlings... ryan, clarice, jia jia, enqi and matthias... when can i ever see them again?

perhaps that subject really prefer the ones who have completed NS or are in midst of serving. i wonder how, i wonder why...

and oh, nowadays many people getting sick. really....get well soon.... especially YOU... you might not see this entry but perhaps unknowingly hope you receive this get well wishes. do take your meals on time.. don't play around with your stomach. not funny...

still taking time to let go of certain stuff... still find it difficult. it's not easy really. and i have come to realize that i only feel comfortable talking to certain people. and i continue wondering... why have i treated the subject(s) that manner and haiz...sighs... when will i receive the revelation?

Francis Lim was called home to be with the Lord leaving behind his beloved ones. (who will the names be?)

hair is long...must cut..very ugly.

looking forward to shoot tomorrow..

i want this bible!!!

who says oldies are shit?

here's another...



MLTR - Breaking My Heart

I'm on the floor
counting one minute more
Noone to break the silence

Staring into the night
all alone but that's alright
It's the feeling deep inside I don't like

Chorus:
There is no excuse my friend
for breaking my heart
breaking my heart again
This is where our journey ends
Your breaking my heart again

Here in my bed
counting the words you've said
They linger in the shadows

Coming home late at night
drunk again but that's alright
It's the look in your eyes I don't like

Chorus:
There is no excuse my friend
for breaking my heart
breaking my heart again...


hey anyways, for all those who are sick there, remember, health is more impt than anytg else ya... take ur medicine and don't overwork... God Bless...

lthe emotional winds

today's a bad day. i dragged myself to go to school. i wonder how i am going to drag myself to school tomorrow... why is this happening?

i still can't get over it. i still can't get over the subject. i tried my best to but it's so damn tough. went to al-ameen, i dragged myself there. i dun know why, but i guess i won't frequent there as much as i used to anymore. not that the place is bad, but it's me. the fault lies in me.

i miss secondary school days so much. the times where i stress myself for the o levels. the times where i waste my time sitting around with my buddies at the clementi ave 2 hawker centre and talking trash. i miss those times. now that i am here in FSV, i just hate it when my buddies are in the army. so little topic to talk about. it's as if there's a generation gap. shit, i should have studied a levels man! FSV suck...

semester's ending soon, i have to remind myself. but there's one more left. the final lap and off i will leave FSV without a heck or do i care about this stupid course!

think this song speaks of how i feel

楓
Feng

Composer: Jay Chou (周杰倫) Lyricist: Devon (宋健彰)

烏雲在我們心裡擱下一塊陰影
wu yun zai wo men xin li ge xia yi kuai yin ying
我聆聽沉寂已久的心情
wo ling ting chen ji yi jiu de xin qing
清晰透明
qing xi tou ming
就像美麗的風景
jiu xiang mei li de feng jing
總在回憶裡才看的清
zong zai hui yi li cai kan de qing

被傷透的心能不能夠繼續愛我
bei shang tou de xin neng bu neng gou ji xu ai wo
我用力牽起沒溫度的雙手
wo yong li qian qi mei wen du de shuang shou
過往溫柔已經被時間上鎖
guo wang wen rou yi jing bei shi jian shang suo
只剩揮散不去的難過
zhi sheng hui san bu qu de nan guo

緩緩飄落的楓葉像思念
huan huan piao luo de feng ye xiang si nian
我點燃燭火溫暖歲末的秋天
wo dian ran zhu huo wen nuan sui mo de qiu tian
極光掠奪天邊
ji guang lüe duo tian bian
北風掠過想妳的容顏
bei feng lüe guo xiang ni de rong yan
我把愛燒成了落葉
wo ba ai shao cheng le luo ye
卻換不回熟悉的那張臉
que huan bu hui shu xi de na zhang lian

緩緩飄落的楓葉像思念
huan huan piao luo de feng ye xiang si nian
為何挽回要趕在冬天來之前
wei he wan hui yao gan zai dong tian lai zhi qian
愛妳穿越時間
ai ni chuan yue shi jian
兩行來自秋末的眼淚
liang hang lai zi qiu mo de yan lei
讓愛滲透了地面
rang ai shen tou le di mian
我要的只是妳在我身邊
wo yao de zhi shi ni zai wo shen bian

在山腰間飄逸的紅雨
zai shan yao jian piao yi de hong yu
隨著北風凋零
sui zhe bei feng diao ling
我輕輕搖曳風鈴
wo qing qing yao ye feng ling
想
xiang
喚醒被遺棄的愛情
huan xing bei yi qi de ai qing
雪花已鋪滿了地
xue hua yi pu man le di
深怕窗外楓葉已結成冰
shen pa chuang wai feng ye yi jie cheng bing

JESUS IS LORD - MY LORD

The series of messages are inspiring...
simple and nice postcard designs

definitions again

sur·prise ( P ) Pronunciation Key (sr-prz)
tr.v. sur·prised, sur·pris·ing, sur·pris·es

1. To encounter suddenly or unexpectedly; take or catch unawares.
2. To attack or capture suddenly and without warning.
3. To cause to feel wonder, astonishment, or amazement, as at something unanticipated.
4. 1. To cause (someone) to do or say something unintended.
   2. To elicit or detect through surprise.

n.

1. The act of surprising or the condition of being surprised.
2. Something, such as an unexpected encounter, event, or gift, that surprises.

negatively true....

verses of the day for me

Genesis 12:2-3 (New International Version)

New International Version (NIV)

Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society

2 "I will make you into a great nation
and I will bless you;
I will make your name great,
and you will be a blessing.

3 I will bless those who bless you,
and whoever curses you I will curse;
and all peoples on earth
will be blessed through you."

today.

woke up late today. took cab with sister to expo for service. no choice because i had to rush for Lord's supper duties. sister was in bad mood cause had something with father. well, tried my best to console her ar...

after service went for cell group. felt so bad for not remembering to bring my guitar for worship, but hey i know Dennis forgave me. Thanks Dad!

ok so things ended at expo hall 10... went to take MRT to go town. proceeded to Carls JR. met with Ismail and gang. so long never see JJ, niahkong, the dinner was cool....but then super full. can die...

went up for bowling. i am tyco n suck. well, but even though emotionally i was unstable, i can say hanging out just for that few hrs was worthwhile. Thanks dudes.

and so walked to bus stop to take bus. then stomach made complaints about the burger. bo bian, walked to esplanade to pang sai. the disabled toilet was shiok. clean and so home-like. then after that took bus with khien back home.

reached home, washed up, turned on laptop, then shocked! seriously, what did i do wrong this time dude? feel like shit now... gotta go to yahoo games release my frustrations! yeah!!! but again, i really feel so sorry and i really feel like shit.

what to do... the world is so unfair. If only i could be called home to be with the Lord - RIGHT NOW!

6-day wait

now that i watched the personal Discovery Channel, i have realized that Israel actually had problems with Lebanon in a very different way.

28th July 2006 - Friday
Israel was on really good terms with Lebanon. Things were smooth sailing in a sense.

29th July 2006 - Saturday
Israel and Lebanon had talks. Meetings were held. Ministers visit each other. Both parties even exchanged much sms. Israel and Lebanon at that point were still on good terms.

30th July 2006 - Sunday
Israel sorted out its thinking and approached its good friend, US, and tols US that the relationship with Lebanon has out of gratitude, not admiration for political powers. Lebanon officials were kept in the dark, not knowing that talks were exchanged between Israel and US.

31st July 2006 - Monday
Both Israel and Lebanon were still acting normal towards each other. Lebanon still continued to maintain diplomatic and bilateral talks with Israel. But Lebanon started feeling weird as to why Israel reacted to Lebanon in such weird replies and manners.

1st August 2006 - Tuesday
Both countries reamained neutral.

2nd August 2006 - Wednesday
The Prime Minister of Lebanon went over to Holland for some bilateral exchange talks with the government there. Lebanon wanted to drop by Israel and have a chat over a cup of coffee with Israel's Prime Minister but was rejected. Lebanon's PM had no choice but to go back to his homeland. Lebanon's PM felt even stronger that something was amiss. But, Lebanon's PM still believed that Israel would still be the good friend of his country.

3rd August 2006 - Thursday
Lebanon's PM made a courtesy and concern call to Israeli PM. Lebanon's PM was kind of rejected because Israel's PM was too busy to entertain Lebanon's PM. Lebanon's PM felt like shit, thinking what on earth has he done wrong.

4th August 2006 - Friday
Both Israel and Lebanon clarified about the incident which happened the day before. Lebanon's PM felt like shit. So the PM of Lebanon specially arranged a flight to Israel to visit his friend, and so during the talk, he was bombarded by words which strained the bilateral relationship between both countries. Lebanon felt the worst. Lebanon was lost for words. Lebanon's PM left and returned to his country. That night, Lebanon's PM could not sleep.

5th August 2006 - Saturday
Lebanon's PM's personal assistant phoned Israel and clarified everything which happened over the past few days. Israel told Lebanon that it's because it was totally impossible for both countries to ensure the peace and stability at the border. And so, Lebanon's soldiers manning the border suffered much casualties and deaths from Israel Army's continuous fire. Lebanon's PM also found out that this dislike had already started 6 days ago, since 30th July 2006, when Israel talked to US about it.



so what's the moral of the story?
DON'T BE STUPID
Lebanon now feels so stupid, like shit, end of the world, suffers so much, rising death tolls all because Lebanon's PM himself was so stupid to have not realized this early. But i think the Lebanon's PM still loves Israel's PM just as much even till now. But i think Lebanon's PM is really so stupid that he had been kept in the dark for 6 days... sighs



DISCLAIMER
WHATEVER WRITTEN ABOVE IS PURELY FICTIONAL. I HAD NOTHING BETTER TO DO.

it became vapour

around 3pm, exterior location. saw the sms, it vapourized.

hope

Tossing & Turning no more.
Sleep is gone.
Cannot Sleep.
get back to this crappy laptop of mine to key in my continued thoughts...

no matter what, i still hope and pray that the block of ice will miraculously turn into a brick. i don't know how's that going to happen but i hope for the best. and i hope this will turn out to be a surprise.

hope too that for the later part of today, revival will take place.

gonna rest for a few hours. bound to have nice eye bags. a few hrs of sleep is definitely better than none. I pray that i will be charged for the shoots later on.

Hope to have a better day for me ahead.

Sorry...

This Game

that to me was like a game. i seemed to be like the gamemaster. i started the game off badly. Eventually it turned out nice and sturdy. But now, the game's almost going to be over, or rather it has already been.

Time and again, i told myself not to give up on it as a gamemaster. but eventually now it's all gone - just like how all the blocks stacked up came tumbling down. The blocks covered me - entirely. I had no choice but to withdraw from the game.

I fail as a gamemaster. I really did. One of the reasons why i did is because i did not know the rules of the game well. The rules were simple but i chose to make them complicated. Why - can anyone tell me?

There's always this saying - "When you fall down, stand up on your feet again and continue walking". To me, in this situation, i fell but i guess my injuries are really damn bad. It'll definitely take a long time to continue walking normally again.

And tell me why dear Lord, why have i been hearing the "i'm not worthy"s and "don't waste your time"s all in a row? Did i really hear them or am i dreaming? If i heard them, then they must be so true and clear. If i was dreaming, then why the nightmares? And so, what does the word worthy means? One of the meanings as explained from the dictionary means - admirable. And if the subject is not of admiration to me, then why did i keep serving without complaints? I honestly admit that all were done without complaints but rather from the heart.

Strangely, to care simply means to be concerned to the degree of. And reciprocate means to feel in return. I did not expect any form of the latter when i cared. Though the statements of confessions were of highest value personally, i still stood by the subject by faith, and still not expecting anything else in return.

And by faith i believed so strongly things would be sorted out in time to come. I thought things would turn out good. But never did i expect that things would turn out this way. Still, the memories of 11pm at the exterior location on 4th august 2006 will be glued to my soul. Lord, i was lost, totally totally lost for words and any further explanations. I would say appetite's gone for as long as a month to come. It was like that big big bomb falling on Hiroshima. Even local drinks would not be able to wash away the stains of my soul. And when i thought a can of beer would be able to cleanse the stains, the bloody shop restricted the sale after 12 midnite. I know Lord, You saw my heart and the restriction was planned. I am so thankful to You but You know what? I don't know what do i do next. The answers were never there, never.

My Lord my Lord, where do i go from here? What do i do now? To let go is easier said than done. The pain of this game's failure meant so much to me. It meant so negatively significant. Would this ever be a turning point? I think it'll never be. & Right now, i confess i am a villian/ crook/ hyprocrite/ faker/ loser. i know my weaknesses. But i am willing to change for Your sake? I know You are merciful and you would give me that chance to do so. But i am unsure about the subject.

This game is just like a block of ice - so strong and sturdy. But as time passes, the ice eventually melts and turns to water, where it will gradually evaporate and turn to the vapour of the skies and principalities.

I know it's too late now but i know the short period of memories will still remain, deep into the core of my heart and soul.

Thank You.

Semester's ending real soon, but there's one more left.

Acting

acting is tough, at least to me. I'm so sorry Royston that i have no continuity in my acting. hahaha...and i was very impromptu. shit...even acting as a pirated CD seller is not easy. however, i had a great time teasing the FSV all time hunk - Mathen...yeah... nice one mathen... STOP OR I WILL SHOOT!

AND I KNOW I KNOW. I REALLY DO KNOW. I REALLY UNDERSTAND NOW.

FRANCIS LIM - YOU'RE FOOLED?! HAHAHA

Hillsong - The Time Has Come

Found love beyond all reason
You gave Your life Your all for me
And called me Yours forever
Caught in the mercy fallout
I found hope found life
Found all I need
You're all I need

The time has come
To stand for all we believe in
So I for one am gonna
Give my praise to You

Today today it's all or nothing
All they way
The praise goes out to You
Yeah all the praise goes out to You
Today today I live for one thing
To give You praise
In everything I do
Yeah all the praise goes out to You

All we are is Yours
And all we're living for
Is all You are
Is all that You are Lord

short n simple

fierce...
intentions noted finally.

tired

i'm so tired.
so tired.
i'm so worn out.
so worn out.

poly is hell.
it really is.

when all else fails, i remember that "i've done my best"

giving up is easy but to persevere on is not...
WHY? WHY? WHY?

we're all but human beings... agree?!

the thought of giving up drifts past slowly bit by bit...
but u know what? I'm not gonna surrender by giving up? nah...surrendering is just simply an excuse. I can't bear to give up...it's painful...it's hurting.

Francis Lim - just shut up and concentrate on your work. focus on your work...not others u idiot..
Francis replies "too difficult ar sir...cannot ar"
Nobody says "so? you gonna continue being like this?"
Francis adds "sometimes when certain things are concerned, it's difficult to give up."
Nobody ends off "then i have nothing to say"

A thousand times I've failed
Still Your mercy remains And should I stumble again
I'm caught in Your grace
Everlasting
Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending
Your glory goes beyond all fame

Your will above all else
My purpose remains
The art of losing myself
In bringing You praise
Everlasting
Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending
Your glory goes beyond all fame

In my heart and my soul
Lord I give You control
Consume me from the inside out
Lord let justice and praise
Become my embrace
To love you from the inside out

Everlasting
Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending
Your glory goes beyond all fame
And the cry of my heart
Is to bring You praise
From the inside out
Lord my soul cries out


my Lord my Lord, provide me a way out.
teach me Your ways...
allow me to dwell in You than the world

Hendersonians

shit man, i miss these dudes!

Zoo?

Andrew Millians' cute boy on TV!

When God Ran, I ran even further away...

Artist: Phillips, Craig & Dean
Title: When God Ran

VERSE(1):
Almighty God, the great I am
Immovable rock, omnipotent, powerful, awesome Lord
Victorious warrior, commanding King of Kings
Mighty conqueror, and the only time – the only time I ever saw Him run

CHORUS:
Was when He ran to me, He took me in His arms
Held my head to His chest, said “My son’s come home again”
Lifted my face, wiped the tears from my eyes
With forgiveness in His voice He said, “Son do you know I still love you?”
He caught me by surprise when God ran

VERSE(2):
The day I left home I knew I’d broken His heart
And I wondered then if things could ever be the same
Then one night I remembered His love for me
And down that dusty road ahead I could see
It was the only time – it was the only time I ever saw Him run

CHORUS:
And then He ran to me, He took me in His arms
Held my head to His chest, said “My son’s come home again”
Lifted my face, wiped the tears from my eyes
With forgiveness in His voice He said, “Son do you know I still love you?”
He caught me by surprise as He brought me to my knees
When God ran – I saw Him run to me

BRIDGE:
I was so ashamed, all alone and so far away
But now I know He’s been waiting for this day

CHORUS:
I saw Him run to me, He took me in His arms
Held my head to His chest, said “My son’s come home again”
Lifted my face, wiped the tears from my eyes
With forgiveness in His voice I felt His love for me again

He ran to me, He took me in His arms
Held my head to His chest, said “My son’s come home again”
Lifted my face, wiped the tears from my eyes
With forgiveness in His voice He said, “Son”, He called me Son
He said, “Son do you know I still love you?”
He ran to me and then I ran to Him
When God ran

thoughts
I've been in a state of confusion. life has been hectic with piles of junk from schoolwork. not being able to sleep due to work and revision. not being able to sleep due to thinking of stuff. and ya... This song speak to me about going to run after the desires of the world or the desires of Him. Which should i choose? I suppose i would prefer both but then, it's always about decision making.

Felt weird though... even things seem so faraway. I've always been neglecting of so much things and being so insensitive to so much stuff. These days, i felt i've lost something from within myself.

the circle of confusion will never have an ending.