“Are We in Love?”
With all these considerations, many are still left asking the big question, “Are we really in love?” As you try to answer that question, ask the following:
Do you love to talk to one another all the time—in all occasions? Do you enjoy virtually every minute that you spend together? Do you find that with each new date, you become more interested in the other person—in what he thinks, what she does, what he hopes and dreams, what she has to say?
Respect is one of the most important aspects of human relations, and it flows from many tangibles and intangibles. Do you deeply respect each other? This is not a simple, friendly respect, but a deep and growing mutual respect that leads directly to trust.
Once you make your decision, it is no longer a matter of finding a man or a woman who is pleasing to you, but instead trying now to see how you can best please this man or this woman you have come to deeply love—and have chosen to love. Are you prepared to make the continual enhancement of that love a lifelong goal?
Recall that the world is all about “falling in love at first sight.” But this does not happen! Most of humanity continually looks for a “quick fix” in life, not understanding that doing things God’s way almost always takes time! It takes time to grow in character, and anything of beauty and worth takes time and effort. Artists must realize this if they hope to create a masterpiece. Some of the greatest masterpieces take months, or even years, to produce.
Love is the same! It cannot happen overnight or in an instant. You may feel physical attraction immediately, but real, deep love is entirely different. Be careful and, quite literally, “take heed lest you fall” (I Cor. 10:12) in lust, not love. Do not allow your human nature to deceive you. Many have been blinded, to their own hurt. Will this be you?
Love develops only through careful and proper dating and courtship. A relationship between a man and a woman is a wonderful, God-ordained institution, if you allow it to grow and develop. This is applicable to everything of quality.
Real love is never blind. Too often, when a couple allow themselves to become infatuated, they ignore all differences and all weaknesses in each other. Grasp this next point—it is most vital. If you feel there is nothing wrong with your prospective mate, you are kidding yourself—and perhaps willingly deceiving yourself because you are too focused on the physical, what it will be like in bed together! Acknowledge and accept that there will be little idiosyncrasies in the other person. Be sure you are willing to live with both those you see and those you may not yet see.
Finally, on the matter of “Are we in love?”: Are your feelings and actions toward each other selfless? Does the relationship “line up” in all the critical ways discussed? Is God’s involvement evident in your relationship? Do you find that you simply “cannot get enough” of all that is the other person?
Anything less than brutal honesty with these questions brings a failing grade on the test!
Extracted from http://www.thercg.org/books/aadac.html
Posts
