what to do?

medicine is killing me...
medicine is making me so like ....FAKE!

and yeah...planning is killing me...

and like when i sometimes pluck my courage up...it always fail in that way?
i know things would NEVER happen...but why am i still so like damn concerned?

sometimes i thought it would be good never to be concerned....never to care...never to talk...never to do anything...
but it's like i just can't help it when it comes to this and that.

sometimes i wish i could leave this school...
sometimes i wish i could just get memory lost and forget everything except God...
but reality is....what are the chances of all these coming true.
what is the chance of having what i hope and desire for come true? answer is none...and never.

and when i asked. i think i was so like stupid to add in and throw in other questions because i got myself more shit? perhaps RX was right...

http://www.fcbc.org.sg/christmas/

vISIt IT!

What i did today?

O ya...i went for a wedding dinner! my cousin's wedding!
yeah. When will mine be? long time to come ar.
check out the cute little boy..

standards, just like what i will always yell at cadets. "I WANT THE ******* STANDARD FROM YOU UNDERSTAND?!?!?!??!"

YEAH...i am telling myself this, yes this time to myself...I want STANDARD from MYSELF.

behavioural problems
speech and linguistic problems
attitude problems
arghhghghghg

i really really love you.
i really really want to spend time with you.
but i'm so sorry that i can't.
i'm missing you so much, i hope you would but i know what's on your mind

God is Good, all the time, everytime

xpect the unxpected.

Got so disappointed after being bombarded by lecturers during the format pitch for bad budgeting (that's why i can never be a businessman), was so bloody scared that i might just got the group into some deep shit. went to al-ameen, thinking so much on the way, about the pitch and something else. both equally stressful...both equally important to me, but why? don't ask me... i just allow my heart to take me into thinking, wherever i am, whatever it is. and so i was praying like mad deep in my heart that time.

so well, today, God provided me a way, something which is more than what i expected. Thank You and i praise You for all You've done.

was sitting down there just now. one look, it was so painful. so damn painful. i asked, even though i knew but it turned out bad. i called but it somehow ended fast. really fast. so fast. just can't help it. and i just don't understand a single thing. why?

so what are tears for? stressful person? suicidal person? depressed person? lost? or what? whatever you name it... yes... it is.

and so why people suddenly eat so much? just like what that normally special doctors would say. "these are symptons of ..... name it...." i am having that... yeah.... but so what? who knows? who cares? you or You?

u r there but then...

i am lost...

no chance...don't even stand one...

till now they don't heal...i don't think they will ever be...

bullshit

more often than not, being frank is just bullshit.
more often than not, when something serious is being said - people often do not believe.
more often than not, when things go wrong - i have to fakefully admit that whatever i said was joke.
and more often than not, i am often caught in a dilemma and i am a bullshit.

thanks!

sighs a million times and still it will never be enough

some racist joke

wa biang....very funny la...
Note: Coarse language

well did finish some stuff but can't get to sleep.
ya...

i hate it when i can't get to sleep.

You.

sighs, there's a spirit of confusion around. i just don't understand why. ... tell me why?
perhaps i am over sensitive just like what my friend says.

what to do? sometimes i feel like a shit doing something.
i don't understand la.

A CONFUSED ME.

sighs, there's a spirit of confusion around. i just don't understand why. ... tell me why?
perhaps i am over sensitive just like what my friend says.

what to do? sometimes i feel like a shit doing something.
i don't understand la.

A CONFUSED ME.

eMPOWER mE

Empower Me
Claire Cloninger, David T. Clydesdale

Key: C

Verse 1:
   C          F 
Nobody knows how weak I am,
 C 
better than You;
               F 
Nobody sees all of my needs,
C 
better than You.
     F               Em        Am 
And nobody has the power to change me,
     Dm7                  E 
from what I was born to be.
F                      C     Am 
Jesus be strong in my weakness,
Dm7     G 
empower me!


Chorus:
C  G    Am           Dm7 
Empower me, like a rushing river
G                 C 
flowing to the sea.
                 F 
Lord, send Your Holy Spirit
G                      A7 
flowing now through me.
           Dm7               G 
Till I'm living as Your child,
E                 Am 
victorious and free,
          Dm7               G 
send the power of Your love,
        C 
empower me.


Verse 2:
Nobody's eyes see through my soul,
better than Yours;
Nobody's love can make me whole,
no one but Yours.
And nobody has the power to lift me,
to reach for eternity.
Jesus break through all my defences,
empower me.

©1983, 1984 John T. Benson Publishing Company (Admin. by Brentwood-Benson Music Publishing, Inc., 741 Cool Springs Blvd., Franklin TN 37067)
All rights reserved. International copyright secured.
CCLI song #101874

waiting

worried. doing something at the same time.

so what time is it now.

oh well.... life is hectic these days.
have been missing church services.
i am missing hall 10.
i am missing Him.
and i am missing You.

1 more month or so.... shooting starts.
how much $$$ i get from SFC, i don't know.

let's pray for the best and i'm am waiting because i am worried.

how i hope i can build a family like this

Celebrating the Family

Do you feel like you are left out as a family member or you can’t along well with your family? As part of the Celebrate the Family Festival, Reverend Simon Yee talks about loving and honouring our families and why we live in a family.

Family is God’s idea. God has it designed so that we are born and to be raised in a family. For many of us, the only time we leave the family is when we get married and start a new family of our own. But “leaving” the family doesn’t mean that you are no longer part of the original family you were born in. It simply means that now you have one of your own to treasure and grow with. I believe that Jesus would understand and celebrate his family well. He could have possibly started His ministry much earlier. Imagine, would Jesus not make a bigger impact, achieving more grounds with 12 solid years instead of 3 years? These days we have millionaire footballers that are under 21 years of age! Perhaps knowing WHY is not half important as knowing WHERE Jesus was in those 30 years of his life? I am certain that Jesus was celebrating the family. In John 19:25-27, one cannot help but marvel at Jesus final desire while suffering on the cross. In his mind, there was one thing he had to do when he saw his earthly mother standing near the Cross and his one final act of fidelity was to ensure that his mother would be taken care of before he goes back to his Heavenly Father! Family means so much to Jesus and if that is so, it should be the same for us. But what is God’s desire for the Family? Here are a few pointers I would like to share with all of you,

1. God desires that the family is a place to Learn about God. In Deuteronomy 6:6-7, the scripture sets a pattern that help us to relate the Word of God to our children by emphasising the importance of parents teaching the bible to their children, as commanded by God. The church cannot be used to escape from this responsibility. Instead, eternal truths are the most effective and best learned in a loving environment of a God-fearing home. Of course, it takes much effort but at the end of the day, it’s worth the while. 2. God desires that the family is a place to Live and Grow. If our faith in Christ is real, it will usually prove itself at home and in our relationships with those who know us best. Children and parents have a responsibility to care for each other. Children should honour their parents even if they are demanding and unfair whereas parents should teach and not be afraid to correct or discipline their children should they display any negative attitude and behaviour. In Proverbs 12:1, the bible clearly states, “Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge. But he who hates correction is stupid”. 3. God desires that the family is a place to Love and Govern. Apostle Paul warned about the last days when people will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, disobedient to their parents and etc rather than lovers of God. The family is a precious sanctum where love is to be shared and experienced by its members. God also designed the family where he admonishes in Ephesians 6:2-4, "Honour your father and mother" - which is the first commandment with a promise - "that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth." Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.

Hence, we can all celebrate the family by • Thanking God for our family • Taking time to be with family members •Let us celebrate and have a delightful time with our family, shall we?

Reverend Simon Yee is a Network Pastor. He also oversees the respective ministry and departments, namely Filipino Ministry, FCBC’s Corporate Communications, Wedding Services and Hospitality.

Ok...long time no c

ok it's really been some long time since i've updated my blog. it's a blog. want to know more about me or find out how i am, just give me a ring or sms lar... or even want to meet me. hahaha. singapore quite small. technology quite advanced.

so riggggghhhhtt, many things have passed for me for approx. 2 months. first, started working for Splash Zone, a kids show. and yes, where's my pay?! learnt to yell at children but not love them. learn to make fun of them instead of taking care of them. learnt to treat them like how i treat my cadets back in henderson. shiok. hahahaa. but because of all these bad stuff that i've done, i've spoilt a total of 2 mobile phones which were drowned in the waters.

ok, so now right, gonna talk on how ibp progresses for my team. actually rigghhht, things have been both fun and stressed la. just went for the 1st location recee with adam, louis, khien and st. whoa! just like what chandler said, it would be fun but then righhhtt it's damn tiring. imagine, left house at 6+am and returned home close to 12 midnight. madness!!! but then right, it's still the starting, haven't shoot yet. shoot righhhttt, is definitely gonna be more and more siong.

so, have been also stressed thinking about that some thing and that some issues. stressing me up seriously, especially during this so called holiday season. whatever la huh... sometimes things that i just do really stupid. dunno what to say. when i think of it, arh...i just do. but after i do it, wah lau, the hokkien phrase is "really have to tio meh", aka really deserved to be scolded. you say i too much free time, not really...but then...how do i put it...hmm...i just felt nice doing it lor. i just feel nice helping people lor. i just feel nice seeing people happy lor (hopefully la huh). certain things cannot be forced, i know... but to say to stop doing it is really a madness thing to do. saying is easy, but doing it is so difficult. chatting is such a nice pasttime, but then the aftermath of chatting is really so pain, well at least to me, i dun know if you feel the same. (well...probably not)

have not been to church for ages. and ya...really ages. i miss hall 10.